Book Review: Becoming Myself

#TherapistLifeGoals

Becoming Myself at the most basic level is a collection of short stories and thoughts on a beautiful life. Irvin Yalom writes in a way that is simple and elegant with no sense of grandeur. He is easy to understand and extremely relatable- he keeps it real talking about both his successes and challenges. Yalom was born in 1931 and entered medical school to become a psychiatrist in 1957. Since that time he has written hundreds of professional articles, over a dozen books, has spoken at scores of events, and has touched the lives of countless patients through his psychotherapy work and his work with other practitioners.

Yalom has always been a personal hero of mine and I distinctly remember how hard I fangirled when I was able to meet him at a conference and have him sign my copy of The Spinoza Problem. Not only do I see myself in his stories of feeling lost as a child, or anxious as a young professional, I also see myself in his love of reading, philosophy, and psychology. I will admit that I have always felt a little different from my peers. In my therapy practice, and in supervising interns, I have always incorporated novels and philosophy. Forcing it on them more often than not. And they indulge my nerdiness with geniality. They don’t quite get it though; but in Yalom I found someone that shared my experience and passions. That is a major reason why I started my private practice— I want to be better able to balance my passions.

As a therapist, and still relatively young in my career, it is beyond comforting to know that a man that is a giant in the field, that quite literally wrote several of “the books” in therapy, also suffered from what we presently call imposter syndrome. Imposter syndrome is defined as feeling as if you are not as competent as other’s believe you to be. It is a feeling of anxiety. Of discounting our knowledge, skills, and abilities. It is a feeling of being a fraud. The biggest secret of all? We all can experience it. In varying degrees yes, but it can impact all of us. Even the giants.

It was fascinating to read about Yalom’s life experiences- things that I can only imagine today. From growing up in Washington DC, pursuing medical school at Johns Hopkins, living on some of the most picturesque islands, year long sabbaticals in foreign countries-Is that even a thing anymore!?-, and having an academic career that spanned 30 years. And, arguable most importantly, doing it all with his high school sweetheart by his side (who was in her own right a bad ass pioneer of women’s studies). Finishing the book was bittersweet. His memoir is more than likely one of the last books he will write due to his age and failing memory. All I can think is, what a life!

Yalom, I. D., (2017). Becoming myself: A psychiatrists memoir. Basic Books. 

Keywords: Existential Therapy, Imposter Syndrome, Psychiatry, Psychotherapy, Memoirs, History of Therapy